エッセイ = MBA受験の本丸
TOEFL/IELTS/GMAT/GRE 高得点 = 合格 となるMBAトップスクールはおそらく存在しません。
その意味でTOEFL/IELTSは必要条件であり、MBAのディスカッション形式のケースメソッドに貢献できるだけの英語力を持っているか以前に、「大学院に入学する程度(大学卒業程度)の英語力があるか」を最低限確認する程度です。同様に、GMATは必要条件であり十分条件ではありません。読解力と論理的思考力だけでは優れたリーダー候補とはみなされません。
人柄やリーダーの素質を評価するには志願者本人の独自の経験や価値観や使命感、将来のキャリアプランをアドミッションに伝えるがあり、その意味でエッセイ、インタビューが合格の最重要要因と言えます。
MBAは「リーダーの育成」を使命としていますので、何より大切なのがエッセイ、特にゴールエッセイとリーダーシップエッセイです。この2つのエッセイで
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将来のキャリアゴール
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自身のリーダーシップと人柄
について実現可能でインパクトのあるキャリア像、リーダーのポテンシャルを示すことが不可欠です。MBAアドミッショズチームは多くのエッセイに目を通しますので、ありふれた内容ではなくオリジナリティに溢れたエッセイでなければ魅力的な志願者に映らないはずです。
Goal essay sample (almost 300 words)
I am pursuing an MBA to transition into a career in asset management and expand the market for sustainable and responsible investments (SRI). Therefore, after graduating from Stern I aim to work as a Product Manager at a firm such as Black Rock Japan.
As the youngest leader Equity Operations team to implement daily settlements and projects, I have led the 3-year industry-wide project to develop a new settlement for stock loan transactions from scratch, which gave me a foundation in management. These experiences and study to be certified as an International Investment Analyst taught me how the financial market can connect investors and fund-raisers. As I became more and more interested in leveraging the financial market to help solve social problems, I realized it was time to shift my career focus towards SRI as a vehicle facilitating private sector investment into social infrastructure.
My personal history contributed to this decision. As I received a scholarship for university after my fathers death and my family was receiving national insurance benefits to care for my bed-ridden grandmother, I experienced how such support impacted my life. To share this support, I have joined charities and volunteer work in activities. Now I aim to do more, and meet
societys needs through SRI, especially in education and healthcare worldwide in the era of aging, declining population and austerity.
SRI attracts private investment to participate in social development and take social responsibility. However, SRI in Japan accounts for only 0.2% of investments in comparison to over 10% in European countries and the United States, so I am determined to change the situation through increasing specific SRI products and extending SRI investors.
Points that should be in
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What is your goal?
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Why does your goal matter to you and society?
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What does MBA program at School A help you to achieve your goal?
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What have you made efforts for your goal?
Leadership essay sample (almost 400 words)
My Contribution to Stock Loan Market
The introduction of Delivery-versus-Payment (DVP) settlement for Japanese stock loan market is my significant achievement professionally. The innovative DVP settlement is the 1st of its kind in the world in that it settles stock loan trades linked to cash and securities collateral, and drastically reduces the settlement risk relating to stock loan trade. I played two roles in this 3-year project: I represented Citigroup for the conference involving the Bank of Japan, Financial Services Agency, trust banks and investment banks, and served as the youngest project leader of Operations in Global Investment Bank A.
Investment banks favored stock delivery on each trade, while trust banks wished to bundle stocks per counterpart. When both sides showed no compromise, I arranged meetings where representatives from both groups discussed this issue. We resolved this conflict and worked together to create a unanimously approved DVP. The DVP settlement brought about great breakthrough in terms of risk-reduction, collateral types and even Straight Through Processing (STP).
The project team I led remarkably enhanced settlement system and streamlined procedures. Building strategy for the project, some insisted on meeting minimum requirements initially and then considering other enhancements, while others argued ambitiously to do both from the start. Though both opinions were logically correct, I needed to decide what strategy to adopt. At the meeting, I shared that our colleagues were struggling with the workload supporting us, but we could help them if we did both from the start. I then asked the team what we should do. Everyone chose the ambitious plan. After that, I coordinated the team so individuals could focus on their work and we could maximize progress. Completely redesigning the settlement procedure, we achieved the DVP and STP including automated collateral management, which greatly increased efficiency and resiliency as collateral payment and stock delivery are processed automatically and simultaneously. Indeed, Japanese stock loan market and Equity Operations significantly strengthened as an infrastructure in financial industry.
I grasped the importance of respecting each participant’s interests and of cooperation, even between competing groups with different opinions. I reconfirmed the value of shared goals and strategy for achieving higher goals and honed my ability to make decisions under uncertainty. Indeed, I understood that a leader’s role is to demonstrate confidence for success and direct a team to achieve the best result possible in any situation, and I started to desire greater leadership and management skills.
Points that should be in
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What is your leadership?
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What did you do and think actually?
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What impact did you make and what is a result?
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Based on your current leadership and skills, what do you expect to grow further?
Community Contribution essay sample (almost 300 words)
Contribution to MBA B-School community
Talks with alumni reinforced my belief that relationships with classmates and alumni networks are precious merits of the MBA B. I plan to take initiative to plan and host sports and cultural events to foster collaboration, learn from each other and develop life-long friendships as I did leading the relay marathon team in my current company.
Close colleagues and I started relay marathon team. We attracted 15 members and I arranged long-distance running practice, scheduled the itinerary, looked for drivers, and made a course-map. Through preparation, we got acquainted better and our team became united. During the 60 mile relay, every member enjoyed running and supported the team as schedule-keepers and guides to prevent traffic accidents. To my surprise, this event was also improved professional relationships, facilitating cooperation among members beyond teams and divisions.
I will join the Football club and MBAT as a player and organizer to coordinate an excursion to Paris team matches. I will also organize running events such as relay marathons on the beautiful 2012 Olympic course and fun futsal (indoor soccer) games with classmates and sometimes alumni to expand our networks. In MBA B community, everyone is a cultural ambassador representing his/her country, so I will lead the 2016 Japan Trip from developing the itinerary to looking for sponsors to guiding classmates in Japan as my classmate can enjoy Japanese culture and tradition.
Furthermore, as an alumnus, I will continue organizing fun events to connect alumni and current students by bringing the same energy to MBA B community as I have contributed as an alumnus of my College Soccer Club, organizing futsal and events to foster relationships and help current students find jobs. I look forward to joining MBA B community!
Optional essay sample (almost 300 words)
Academic history
I graduated from College C in 20XX as the first university graduate in my family. My parents only graduated from high school, but unfortunately my father passed away when I was high school. Thus, I took full responsibility to earn my entire tuition as a first-generation student.
During college, I worked hard not to burden my family, but have never thought of that as unfortunate. Part-time work was a valuable opportunity to hone my sense of responsibility as a mature adult, and I met life-long mentors who not only taught jobs but also helped me learn professionalism firsthand.
However, I realize that I should have focused more on academic activities, especially freshman year, when my GPA was only 2.97. Sometimes I failed to handle my studies, soccer team activity, and part-time jobs and I should have considered my capacity and improved my time management.
Since sophomore year, I managed my schedule much more effectively. My academic result improved as my GPA remained above 3.0 for sophomore year and 3.36 for junior and senior years. I passed mathematics courses I had failed previously with an A and B respectively. Additionally, I
had been the sole member of the varsity soccer team from the Chemistry department and led the team as game captain to win the Tokyo University Soccer League.
Recommendation letters
Regarding recommendation letters, I could not disclose my decision to pursue an MBA or ask my current manager for a recommendation. Recently, he nominated me to lead a big project and moreover I know that in the past he had refused my colleague’s request to write a recommendation letter for MBA application. Therefore, I asked 2 senior colleagues who know my performance well and are qualified to write a recommendation letter for me.
I read MBA consulting services and essay counselors. Support from an essay counselor helps me write strong essays. One of my concerns is that some websites disclose track records of MBA admissions. I am curious about whether the numbers of track records accurately indicate the quality of counseling. I do not intend to say that the information on the track records is false, but I think the number on the track records does not always lead to essay counselors' ability to support applicants.
What makes it possible to get into MBA? Is it counseling and other external services or applicant's capability? Even sushi chefs possess excellent techniques but cannot cook the best quality sushi without fresh, raw seafood. In this sense, admission records are the result of a combination of counseling support and applicants' qualifications.
If I were an essay counselor aiming to build a strong track record to promote my service, I might be tempted to select only the most promising candidates. After all, individuals who have graduated from top universities and work for global companies are more likely to gain admission to top-tier MBA programs. While track record is undeniably a factor, I believe that the most crucial element is the personal connection between the applicant and the essay counselor. It's important to be aware of potential biases in track records and not rely solely on them.
TOEFLの勉強を続けていて、少しの休憩時間にMBAエッセイカウンセリングのページを見てみました。頼りになるカウンセラーさんにエッセイをサポートしていただければ心強いですが、カウンセラーの合格実績=数字がカウンセリングの質をそのまま表しているのも違うと思うのです。
カウンセリングが優れていたからエッセイが強力になったのか、それとも出願者の経歴がもともと良かったからなのか判断のしようがないです。お寿司屋さんだって、新鮮なお魚を握れば美味しいお寿司になりますが、そうでない場合には大将の技量ではどうにもならない部分もあると思います。同じようにカウンセリングにも限界があるでしょう。
そうだとすると、エッセイカウンセラーが実績だけを伸ばしたい場合、受かりそうな出願者ばかりを選り好みしたほうが目標達成の可能性が上がります。東京大学や京都大学卒で一流企業や国家公務員のキャリア組、公認会計士や弁護士の資格ならば当然有利だろうと思います。もちろん実績は一つの指標ですが、最後は人柄なんじゃないかと思う次第です。
GMAT Learning beyond 700はMBAトップスクール合格の目安であるGMAT 700を目指す学習サイトです。GMAT学習歴、TOEFLスコア、社費・私費などを全て問いません。MBA出願やスコアメイクの一助となれば幸いです。
以下の各リンクよりGMATや英語学習についてご参照いただけます。
ちょっとしたコラムや当ページの補足説明になります。
過去のGMATセクションについて紹介しております。
Focus Edition以前の旧バージョンのGMATに基づいた内容を含みます
GMAT Focus Edition と 旧バージョンはスコアや形式が異なり、同じパーセンタイル・順位なら前者の方が40-50点くらい低いです。
645 (Focus Edition) = 700 (旧バージョン)
605 (Focus Edition) = 650 (旧バージョン)
がスコア換算の目安になりますので、受験体験記やビジネススクールのAdmissionsクラスプロフィールをチェックする際にご注意ください。